Sunday, April 29, 2007

I'm going to borrow some Ani DiFranco wisdom:

I am not an angry girl
But it seems like I've got everyone fooled
Every time I say something they find hard to hear
They chalk it up to my anger
Never to their own fear

In other news, Dan assembled a desk for me at work and helped me clean out my car this weekend! He's the best. Oh, and he cleaned my computer screen and grilled some salmon. I'm lucky.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Today I went to see a psychologist who actually recommended I deal with my problems rather than medicating myself into a vegetable. I really appreciated that. Life sucks, no one's brain is wired the same way, and people should learn to manage pain and problems, biological or circumstantial, rather than numbing themselves out of the human experience. Lets face it. We're all insane.

In other news, last week my 12 year old protege, Makenna, brought two of her chickens to our art lesson. It was awesome. We took them both to the park for a walk. Behold:

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

I have a confession: my guilty pleasure is celebrity gossip. Yes, much worse than McDonalds cheeseburgers, M&Ms or tanning. I've slowly become disenchanted with the actual news. I use to watch nothing but news programs and shun every aspect of pop culture, but frankly, which is really more soulless? Since I don't have TV, I check Fox and CNN online once a day or so at work, but whenever I'm in a place where I have the opportunity to watch them live, I can only stand about a minute or so. News has become repulsive and base and transparent. Everytime I encounter the news media, I'm reminded of Andy Warhol's Car Crash series, which mocked us for our fascination and commercialization of tragedy and death. Such as, the other day I showed Dan an article about the acquittal of the "dugeon rapist", and he replied, "There's a video so that you can watch the family of the accusors cry?" I'm not the only one either--I just read a great article at the gym about news programs having to compete with the Daily Show for ratings and (snicker) credibility. Good! I hope the news as we know it ceases to exist. Frankly, I don't give two shits about politics anymore. I don't care about Iraq, I don't care about dismembered ex girlfriends, I don't care about the election, I don't care about Congressmen jacking off to gay porn. All I really care about anymore is when vile Tom and Katie are going to get a divorce (I hope it's soon).


Monday, April 23, 2007

This weekend was the Grand Prix. On my way to the park--because it was such a gorgeous day--I passed all the fraternities on the hill with students lying in the grass, drinking beer and looking forward to things. It occures to me that I may never be one of them. Money is bull shit, I just want to go to college and have a normal life.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Apparently I shocked some people with my post about smoking weed. I was advised that any prospective employers will likely not consider me after doing the routine stalking through Google. Their loss. Seriously, people. Our great art museums and galleries would be empty were it not for the phenomenon of mind altering substance. Even the Renassiance painters were all mad from lead paint fumes.

All I can say to this is... LEGALIZE IT, BABY!

Speaking of idiosyncratic Conservativism (and close to home!)...

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

This morning I was driving out of Dan's sub-division and there were so many goddamn mini vans at the corner that I could barely get by. I couldn't figure out what was going on at first; it seemed strange. Then I realized they were all waiting with their middle school and high school aged children at the bus stop. In the area, at least two 14/15 year old girls have been abducted from bus stops and raped in the past month or so. I was sure that was why they were there. It was a testament to how fucked up the world is when kids in suburbia can't wait at a bus stop for ten minutes a block away from their house.

Saturday, April 7, 2007

I've been drinking way too much lately. However, vanilla soy milk+vodka+kahlua+more vodka+sex=a better white Russian than you've ever had.
I finished a painting of Dan and me. I think I want to dedicate an entire series to our sex life, since it's so good and so integral to both of us, together and respectively. I would like to organize a show before the next gallery walk. I managed to throw the last one together in a month, which involved completing half the paintings in it and spending an entire week on the food alone. It was insane, but motivating, and I had a great time at the show, despite being too drunk to remember most of it.

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Last night I started on a painting. It made me happy, because I haven't painted something that really clicked in a long time, and I need to do something besides brooding around in my art studio being miserable. I've spent the last few days overwhelmingly depressed, barely able to function. I've had to leave work early two days in a row. This morning I woke up with Dan in the loft and realized that the fact that I'm essentially homeless and chemically unbalanced is inconsequential when I have a man who will drive an hour on a weeknight just to sleep next to me on plyboard and ceiling tile. When I was a kid, I loved books about people who lived in bizarre places... box cars, hollowed out trees, museums. I should be all about this.

Anyway. I'm going to go for a run tonight. Then I'm going to attempt to work on the mural at the yoga studio and make some progress. I think as long as I am investing myself in the things I should be doing, I will be happy.