Monday, May 28, 2007

Waitressing is a double edged sword. On the one hand, the money I make where I work is great and I generally enjoy the job. On the other hand, it seems to exaggerate the stagnant reality of my life right now. Every other table asks me questions about myself that I really have no answer to. There's something sort of fundementally depressing about saying "I'm a waitress." Then again, maybe more depressing are my co workers who have degrees in both useless liberal arts areas as well as seemingly useful ones (example: meteorology) but seem to have given up hope of getting "real jobs." Then I have to wonder if it's worth it trying to prod myself through school just to get a degree for the sake of having an answer to give to the nosey customers who want to know what sorts of fabulous and interesting things I'm doing with my life when I take off my apron and go home. It's a little ridicuous, really. It seems to me that I shouldn't even bother unless I'm going to school in order to pursue a specific career, not just "get a degree". On the other hand, I'm certainly not happy just waiting tables, ignoring my art, and living in my studio. I've decided that when I come back from Omega this summer, I'll have a decision about what I'm going to do and where I'm going to go. Hopefully a summer spent in New York with lots of eccentric, free spirited individuals will give me some perspective I'm missing here.